We didn't expect him to make it past Christmas, and we are so grateful and also amazed. He is still losing weight, is on a good amount of continuous pain meds...a subcutaneous Fentanyl pump getting 75 mcg/hour. He changes demeanor and capabilities by the moment now and is having more frequent episodes of high anxiety where you can't reason with him. The doctors and nurses at hospice speak very highly of the care we give him, and some have told me personally they would hope for someone like me to advocate for them if they were ever in Gary's condition. That really makes me feel like the hard work and stress are truly necessary and appreciated. I am so thankful we've been able to keep him home all this time and I could never do that without Hospice at this point. Don't mind saying we are all tired and worn down a bit, but the precious moments we get with Gary are priceless.
He wouldn't still be here if he weren't home. He tracks and wants to know who's coming when each day and when each of us will be home. Have to repeat it sometimes, but he's still the Dad and husband watching over his flock in that way. He is hallucinating more and now they are full-sized people (were always miniature people before). Saw his Mom last week. First time he mentioned her since this all started and he told our caregiver, not us, so I know that was very real to him.
He has to be under 110 lbs. now from his November starting point of a healthy 186. His dominant right arm bicep measurement is down to 24cm from a previous measurement of 26.5cm on his 6' frame. So thin and frail looking, but he can still be surprisingly strong.
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